


no returns or exchanges (the equilibration remix)

by glass_icarus



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Chromatic Character, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-23
Updated: 2011-04-23
Packaged: 2017-10-18 14:01:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/189622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glass_icarus/pseuds/glass_icarus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first rule in life, Azula knows, is that there are no do-overs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	no returns or exchanges (the equilibration remix)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [terajk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/terajk/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Attack its Weak Point for Maximum Damage](https://archiveofourown.org/works/164794) by [terajk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/terajk/pseuds/terajk). 



> Spoilers through S3; mouse over the characters for romanizations.
> 
> Thanks to A. and B. for talking me through this, and C. and L. for the lightning-fast betas! <3 And finally, thanks to Tera for the awesome starting material.

i.

The first rule in life, Azula knows, is that there are no do-overs.

Not that this is a bad thing, since it keeps her on her toes. Perfection, that's what she wants: to be her father's flawless daughter, worthy of Fire Nation princesshood and the glorious legacy of her ancestors, and a better heir to the Fire Lord than her brother could ever dream of becoming. It's true that her efforts are mostly wasted on her mother, whose preoccupation with Zuko is perplexing and infuriating by turns, but then her mother loves Zuko despite his depressing mediocrity. Her father's standards are much more demanding, a whetstone she can use to hone herself into a keen-edged blade.

So Azula works. Firebending comes easily to her-- precision, control, the flow of her body and the exactitude of her desire-- a natural extension of her will; she devours history and military strategy and discovers that building a network of debts and favors is far more efficient than listening at doors. Any Fire Nation courtier worth their salt knows the value of face and 關係, so she chooses her confrontations carefully and keeps her informants satisfied. Or terrified. Usually both; fear is far more dependable than friendship.

It's dangerous to become completely isolated, though, so Azula begins to assess her classmates in the Royal Academy. She dismisses the boys out of hand-- any perceived favor on her part will lead to hopes of marriage prospects-- and most of the girls, who spend too much time fawning and cannot meet her eyes. Her chosen companions must be exceptional, and Azula has no time for people who lack skills and confidence.

In the end, her choice is made easy by happenstance: Ty Lee is blossoming under her acrobatics and 氣功 training, and her loyalty and admiration have remained so steady as to be unquestionable. Her cheerful fluttering nature, while sometimes irritating, is completely foreign to Azula's own and therefore, Azula reasons, a strong asset in an ally. Mai is a different matter-- her childhood crush on Zuko makes her a powerful pawn in Azula's dealings with her brother, and unreadable acquaintances with such proficiency with the 手裏剣 are best kept close, even when one is a firebender.

She'll never have Zuko's traditional advantage of being a first son, but she'll stack the deck in her favor in every other way.

ii.

If pressed, Mai would say that her favorite subject is mathematics. It's a rather regimented choice in comparison to Ty Lee's tumbling and 氣 work, but there's something keenly attractive about the rules of arithmetic and algebra and calculus. Azula thinks it's the logic that appeals to her-- inexorable, inevitable, well-suited to Mai's fastidious nature-- but really what Mai loves is the way the answers don't bend or change according to anyone's whims. It would be so much easier if she could map out her life in equations and proofs.

(She doesn't mention this, of course. Fairness is a line of reasoning that appeals to Zuko, not Azula, and for all her mother's hopes for the future, Mai is Azula's companion for now.)

Azula treats their relationship like a three-way business transaction-- sometimes a four-way one, if their situation relates to Zuko directly-- and Mai knows that Azula's way of framing their interactions is the wisest choice. As the firstborn daughter and the eldest child of her family, she knows the weight and cost of diplomacy in intimate detail; and lately it seems that everything hinges on the delicate balance between herself, Azula, and Ty Lee.

It's still all right, when it's just the three of them; she still values the missions they accomplish together and treasures the freedoms granted by her place. What frightens her, when she thinks about it, is how much certain things still matter, after all these years. How suddenly thin the shield of her misanthropy and general apathy has become, when set against Zuko's return.

He's always been able to unbalance her. She's never been certain whether she appreciates his questions, the questions he forces her to ask. His selective disregard for hierarchies and traditions used to be endearing, but now-- now it's dangerous.

Mai's come a long way since Azula put an apple on her head, and so she keeps her silence, hiding her insubordinate thoughts beneath her usual caustic sarcasm and an expressionless face. She wonders, though, what will be left of her if she continues to compartmentalize her life away.

iii.

"What is she _doing_?" Azula hisses, and Ty Lee's stomach drops as Mai sets the pulley in motion with a blur of red sleeves and flashing steel.

She's always admired Azula for her strength and conviction, the way she bends the world around her to suit her desires, the aura that burns ice-blue and bright as the sun (and Ty Lee doesn't care if nobody believes that she can see it). Azula's scary-- she and Mai know that better than anyone, after all these years-- but Ty Lee has never flinched from loving people for exactly who they are. She knows it's by Azula's grace that she was allowed to become what she is, and she's grateful for it, stands at Azula's side because it's the only way she can even begin to pay her back.

Still. Mai's made Azula _lose_ this time, and they both know how much Azula hates losing. Especially when it means that Zuko wins. Ty Lee would be kind of surprised she didn't see it coming (Mai's aura does go really, _really_ pink around Zuko) if she weren't so afraid of watching their relationship fracture at the seams; the thought makes her tremble so hard that she stumbles when they reach the ground for the first time in years.

"I never expected this from you," Azula is saying when Ty Lee shakes herself out of it. "The thing I don't understand is _why_. Why would you do it? You know the consequences."

Mai's face is set, stone-like. "I guess you just don't know people as well as you think you do. You miscalculated. I love Zuko more than I fear you."

"No, _you_ miscalculated! You should have feared me more!"

Mai's blades are out of her sleeves now, but Ty Lee's eyes are on the lightning flickering around Azula's hands, the sudden deadly flare of her aura--

It's not really a choice this time. Azula's always had everything, and Ty Lee knows what it's like to be alone, what it means to lose when your life isn't a board game and you have nothing to protect you. And Zuko isn't here to even the odds.

She moves.


End file.
